Top 5 reasons why Heskey should be Owen's prefered partner

In light of all the recent debates and endless riots occuring in all over the world, i have devised a very simple TOP 5 list, which should put an end to this madness. Silly football fans, read this and be enlightened.

Heskey is the man to partner Owen.

5. Statistically, England (a.k.a Owen) score more goals if partnered with Heskey

4. His middle name is Ivanhoe. Any opponent would turn into pubescent whiny girls when faced with a player by this name.

3. He wins a lot of free kicks. in key areas. (actually, he just falls around a lot,but the referees think "Golly, that oaf is so big, he can't possibly be falling down on his own...*PHFEEEEEEEEEEEET!!! Freekick!!!*)

2. He can push around opponents until they wither into pubescent whiny girls ("REF! he pushed meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Someone hug me please!)

1. He isn't naturally butt ugly like Crouch or Rooney.

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